Coping With The Loss Of My Precious Pit Bull Hank

So I wasn’t that excited about the New Year.  Maybe due to personal challenges, perhaps the ongoing stress of launching a new brand, Snuggwugg  and everything that comes with owning your own small business. Who knows.  I just wasn’t super excited. And then shortly after Christmas something dreadful happened. I lost my precious pit bull Hank that I have had for almost 16 years.

The first time I laid eyes on Hank he was behind a gate at Dewey Animal Shelter in Las Vegas. I think it was his last day before they were going to put him down. I just couldn’t bare the thought and so I recused him. He jumped on the gate as I walked past and it was love at first sight.

I was in a very dark place at that time in my life. Although I rescued Hank he truly was the one saving me.  I cried on his neck more nights than I could count and he was always there ready to take it every time. Even in his final days weaker than before he would still get up to greet me when I got home. I love him. My family thought I was insane to bring home a Pit Bull that I didn’t even know. Warnings of “he may tear your face off” came  but I was not afraid of him at all.

Hank was always strong and playful so I suppose when he started getting sick somehow I just didn’t want to see it. About a year and half ago he had this odd spell and began to shake everywhere. The vet said he believed it to be a brain tumor but wasn’t sure. Due to his advanced age he felt it best to give him medication that he said would give him a longer life and without pain. So I agreed. In that time he needed an operation for cancer to be removed. Not in his brain but elsewhere. The signs were mounting that my precious friend would not be around much longer. I remember last Christmas praying for God to give me more time with him. I told the Lord I just wasn’t ready yet.

And God did. When Hank’s time came like most I believe it was very sudden. One minute  he was fine and wanting food the next day he had another small shaking spell. I gave him his medication as I did many times before but this time was different. I had to lift him outside each time he needed to go to the bathroom and his legs no longer even worked. It was like I could read his mind though and knew he needed to go out so after struggling to carry my almost 70 lb baby outside he did. Once I got him back to his bed he fell to the floor.

Coping with loss is never easy. As a matter of fact it pretty much stinks. He stopped eating and drinking and I knew he was not going to recover. I had to make the decision to take him in and all I could do was weep. I tried to be strong fearing a breakdown in front of my 3 1/2 year old would really hurt her but it was very hard.

I had to prepare my daughter Matilda for the worst. Sometimes I just can’t believe that he is gone. But I fully believe when I get to Heaven my Hank will be waiting for me just as he always has. Only this time he will be strong and proud & filled with life as he was the very first day I found him. My dog was my loyal friend and I miss him so much. I wrote a note for him about all the wonderful ways he touched my life. It was not how I had wanted to start the New Year but it’s how this new year began for me anyway. Maybe your year didn’t start off that great either. But the only thing you and I can do is to set our face to keep moving and be happy. Regardless of what comes against us. –

Coping with loss

A note to Hank

Hank- I’m not able to grieve as I need to for Matilda cries she doesn’t want you in Heaven if I do.
You were there when I was all alone, you played in the ocean and drove cross country with me and mama. She heard me call your name thousands as you kept trying to drive. You ran away on MT Charleston were lost for Hours till I prayed and God returned you.
You jumped 6 foot fences with no issues and used to terrify our neighbors by jumping in their cars.
You were a Pitt. You were loyal always to me. Chad (my husband) hated how you’d look when he commanded you as if to say- “you’re not Lisa.”
You were a great bed friend till Chad came and kicked you out.
I rescued you from Dewey animal shelter everyone thought I was insane to bring a pit bull home. My uncle feared you’d tear my face off.
You were kind loyal and amazing.

When you got sick I asked God for a little more time with you. It’s been almost 2 years. God was faithful.

You are my forever friend. I asked Jesus for you to be a puppy when I meet you in Heaven so we can start all over again.
No more pain.
No one knows but you and me how much pain and tears you helped me through.
I will see you again my sweet precious dog. There will never be a pet like you you always have my heart. RIP Hank I know I will see you again.

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